How can I be the real me?

Q. Hi,so last year I was in a school were I fit in and I was really happy.But then I 

changed schools and I was myself but I ended up being unpopular and the 

boys called me ugly and made fun of me.At a dance nobody wanted to dance 

with me so after a few months I turned quiet and really shy.If someone talked

to me I said stupid stuff and I wasn't myself at all.So I am gonna change schools.

In September I am starting in a new school and I really wanna fit in there.The 

problem is that I won't be myself.Just a quiet shy girl and I wanna know how

can I be myself?

 

A. Hey :)

 

Thanks for your question! Firstly, do not let this get you down! The most important thing is that you remain true to yourself. Do not let other people stereotype you and try to tell you what you are, because you have free will! The choice to be whoever you want to be! Remember that, above everything else.

 

When you start your new school make sure you are three things...
1. Yourself
2. Honest
3. Open

 

Don't try to be someone you're not to fit in, remain honest with the people you meet, don't make up stories or facts about your previous school and life and be open with people, don't hide away! The key to being yourself is to believe in the person you are! Don't try to change yourself to fit in with the crowd.

 

Think of it as a fresh start! A new start where no one knows your past or how you were at your old school or anything! Take advantage of this to start afresh and make genuine friends with people who appreciate the REAL you!

 

Everyone has a special quality, don't hide yours away! Believe in yourself and your abilities, be confident and forget about any insecurities you may have!

 

Hope this Helps & Good Luck!

Sophie x

How to progress things...

Q. Hey Soph ! Okay so uhm there's this boy riight?

 So what happened was a couple of months ago he took one of my guy friend's phones (they go to the same boarding school in another city not too far from mine) he added me on bbm. I knew he wasn't some pedophile or anything because I asked my friend about it.

So now we've been briefly speaking but not enough to really know each other well, I barely know him. So on Saturday my older brother had a rugby match against their school and of course I went there to watch. When I finally met him he was really sweet like the first thing he said was "I'm so glad you came, its so nice to finally meet you." And my friends made it uber awkward asking him random questions.
So since my friends made it awkward and I told my guy friend about it. He said that"well I could hook you guys up but he doesn't know you well." Now things are a bit tense. I don't know how to start a conversation with him or anything. And I'm really attracted to this guy and I haven't been this attracted to someone since forever. What can I doooo ?

A. Hey :)

Firstly, you are not alone in this issue, so I'm hoping some little snippets of advice will help a lot of people!

So many people make the initial conversation with someone they like and then sometimes it gets to a point where you don't know how to progress things...to move them on...
Its great that you went to the rugby match to meet him in person and see the person behind the messaging! Use this to your advantage! Ask him about rugby, get him talking about how often he plays or his team, anything! He will be a lot more comfortable talking to you about something he likes and does, even after your friends made it awkward for you! After this, start to chat about more general things, films, tv, events, school, friends and try to progress from here. Maybe suggest a meet up with the mutual friend who introduced you to him?

Remember, don't rush into anything or try to be anything you're not! Be yourself and don't be afraid to make the first move and message him first! Once you get him talking, things will become a lot more relaxed! Don't bombard him with messages everyday if he doesn't reply quickly, play it cool and go with what happens! Just don't be afraid to make the effort!

Hope this Helps & Good Luck!
Sophie x

Never kissed a boy...

Q. Hi Sophie. I'm 14 and I have never kissed a boy. I have been to 3 teenage discos where all you are meant to do is meet random boys and kiss them. Done and done. I seem to have a problem saying yes. Before I even see the guy I immediately say no. Normally I don't really care but quite recently at a disco this REALLY cute guy asked and I said no! Im really more of an independent girl, I haven't ever had a boyfriend but I want one. I don't like always being on my own. Well I know there's a lot in this but if u could give me some advice that would be great. Thanks

A. Hey :)

First of all don't think that you're up against the clock to kiss a boy! Although it may seem like a huge deal at the moment, don't rush into anything you don't want. Maybe focus more on getting to know a guy, as opposed to going to these discos and just kissing random guys! That way, when you get to know someone better, you can see whether you have similar interests of which will lead to a good relationship! Being independent is a great character trait to have, so there's no need to lose that for the sake of a boy! My top advice would be to get to know a guy first, become friends, get to know them and as time goes on, if you are interested in each other, you will get that kiss which you want, with a boy who deserves you!

Hope this Helps & Good Luck!
Sophie x