Well, I met this girl last October and we have become really really close friends since then. She would tell me who she likes and her situations with family/friends ect. and vise-versa. With our relationship being so close, I started liking her a lot within the month of March. Since we were so close, I would know who she liked and at this time she liked a guy. But I still tried to get her to have those feelings for me.Well the guy she liked eventually told her that he had similar feelings for her and they went out. I tried to forget about those feelings I had for her. That didn't work out very well. She and the guy broke up in about the end of April beginning of May. Well I tried to give her cushion time and give her 2-3 weeks before I tried to get her to like me. But I procratinated and was too late. She ended up liking another guy, and Ofcourse my life being as amazing as it possibly get, they went out. Well, after them going out for about a month I could tell that things wernt going that good at all. Me being such good friends with her she told me what was happening and I comforted her as much as I possibly could. Checking every day how she was holding up, going to visit her as much as I could, and usually when I did she had just finished crying and she would end up crying even more on my shoulder and I tried to comfort her as much as I possibly could. You can not imagine how mad and upset I was at the guy for doing this to her. After about a week or more of this she eventually ended it with the guy... I was sad that she had to go through this, but I couldn't let what happened last time happen again. So we started talking more frequently and instead of hanging out with all of our friends, just us two would to the park, talk, go for walks ect.. well after two or three weeks of that I felt like she started liking me back. Then there was a time she wasn't online for over a week, and she wasn't replying to me on face book. I Started getting curious of what happened to her after three weeks of not seeing or talking to me she finally sends me a message to me saying " Hey, what's up??? Sorry we haven't talked in a while. I'm In NewFoundland. Im Coming back Next Week. See You At Youth :)." After reading this I was sooo upset and confused. Why didn't she tell me about her leaving??? Why did she take so long to message back?? The worst part is that I missed her sooo much and that made me like her even more. Well a week passed and I was at youth. I tried to act like I didn't know she was coming. So me and my friend were talking waiting for youth to start and from the corner of my eye I saw the door opening and when I looked my heart skipped a beat and she looked so beautiful. I tried to act like I didn't see her and and went on with the conversation wanting her to come up to me. She came up to our the group I was in an I acted like a didn't notice that she was there and pretended to continue my conversation. She said hi to everyone like normal and then after finally saying hi te everyone else in the group she stopped, I looked her in the eye and she looked at me in the eye. Then she finally said "OMGSHH!!! ***** MISSED YOU!!!!" Then she jumped on top of me and hugged me really tight. I hugged her back, put my head in her shoulder and whispered to her "I Missed You Sooo Much." Then she let go and I asked her about her trip and we talked for the rest of the time we were there. I thought we had something going. After youth we started tolling on MSN and she told me something that I didn't want to hear. It turns out that she and this guy were texting while she was in Newfoundland and she liked him. She always talks about him and how nice he is. This has been going on for over 2/3 weeks and I don't know what else to do :(
Hey :)
First of all, Well done. From the sounds of it you have acted as such a valuable friend to have, comforting her when she was down and really 'picking her up' in a sense when things didn't turn out. An attribute which you should be proud to have for really helping her out as best you could.
The question is, is it worth risking your friendship for love?
Being friends for such a long time, you obviously share such a strong friendship of which it is obvious she relies on you for. Maybe she just views you as a friend at the moment and you need to handle it carefully to avoid losing a friendship, but it could also be that she likes you too, could she be trying to make you jealous? It must be hard knowing all about her relationship history and seeing her with someone else when you so desperately want it to be you, however the main issue is, could it ruin your friendship?
Considering her track record and her history of relatively short month-long relationships, do you think she's ready for a serious relationship? You can be her boyfriend for the month at minimum or a friend for a lifetime. A decision only you can make.
Having been in a similar situation myself but the other way round, I would encourage you to tell her how you feel. But be mature about it, you need to remind her how good your friendship is and simply ask if she thinks it could ever be more in a light-hearted, 'what-if' way. You should be able to tell pretty quickly from her reaction whether she feels the same way. But if it isn't what you're expecting, make it absolutely clear that you don't want it to affect your friendship and wish to carry on as normal, which you should try to impliment as soon as possible. If she really values your friendship, I would hope she would look past this and not create any awkwardness between you. Even if worst comes to worst, at least then you know the truth and can try to move on knowing at least you tried and you wont have any regrets.
Hope this Helps & Good Luck!
Sophie xoxo
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